The Big Bang

Do you think it means you're psychic if you were always pretty sure something would happen to you and then suddenly one night it does?

Not necessarily, I suppose. Especially if many things were done on purpose but still somehow inadvertently to lead up to that event.

In my case, this event is my Pyrex casserole dish exploding all over my kitchen last night.

This story actually begins Tuesday night. I had used the dish to cook some ham and by the time dinner was done it was kind of late and I was in an "F these dishes" state of mind. Truth be told I am almost ALWAYS in this state of mind. I hate doing dishes with the fiery passion of a thousand suns. But until we move into a place with a dishwasher this is my lot in life (and Adam's lot increasingly more often).

So the thing about me is this: I am all about appearances even when faced with a pile of dirty dishes that I don't want to do. So I rinsed the plates and pot off and stacked them neatly in the sink to be tackled the next day. As for the Pyrex casserole dish I baked the ham in? I just stuck that back in the now cooled oven and resolved to wash it the next day. That way even though I am obviously a filth monger my kitchen looks reasonably neat.

Not the smartest idea, it turns out.

So fast forward to LAST night. I get home from a harried and way longer than it should have been trip to the supermarket and after I put everything away and did the dishes in the sink I decided it's frozen pizza night. So I turn on the oven to 425 and, knowing that my oven takes a long time to heat up, I go into the bedroom to watch a DVR'd House episode while I wait for 20 minutes or so.

I must have zoned out a little because the next thing I know I hear the key in the door and it's Adam arriving home from class. Coincidentally at this exact moment I realize it smells like burning maple syrup in our apartment and that the hallway is kind of filled with smoke.

SHIT!

I spring up and into the kitchen as Adam walks into the midst of me apparently trying to burn the place down. I open the oven door and smoke comes billowing out. It appears that leftover maple syrup and mustard glaze causes QUITE a bit of smoke with it burns. Who knew? So while Adam busies himself unplugging the smoke alarm we know is about to go off and opening windows, I turn the oven off and open the oven door, fanning it with an oven mitt. A few moments later Adam comes back in.

"You haven''t taken that out yet?" he asked
"No can you do it? I'm scared...." I replied
"Why are you scared"
"Because I've heard that Pyrex can explode"
"Oh so you want it to explode in MY face, not yours!"
"I think my fear might set it off, you're not scared so YES".

So he manned two Ove-Gloves, held his face away and removed the now black-bottomed Pyrex from the oven. I held my breath until he placed it on the counter.

It didn't explode.

SUCCESS!

We both sighed with relief and I went to turn the oven BACK on so I could get the pizza cooked. When I turned around Adam was pouring a pitcher of water into the steaming Pyrex.

"Uhh I don't think you're supposed to do it I think quick changes in temperature are what makes it explode"

"Oh are y..BANG!!!!!!!!!!!"

Before he could even get his statement out that mother exploded EVERYWHERE. Chunks of Pyrex were propelled across the room, across the counter, into the sink, brown mapley-steaming hot water streaming onto the floor. I screamed as though it were my own head that exploded. And then, naturally, began hysterically laughing.

"OMG I TOLD YOU" I could not resist saying.

Adam, once he recovered from the shock, replied that though it created a giant mess, the actual explosion was actually kind of cool and since neither of us was hurt (well except for 1 hour later when a rougue piece of Pyrex became lodged in my foot but that's neither here nor there) then it's all good we suppose.

And you know, I always KNEW this would happen someday. Everytime I removed that dish from the oven, horror stories of Pyrex exploding and chunks of it being embedded in someone's thigh flashed across my mind. Of course this was not nearly that bad but be ye forewarned, if you read this story and thought "That will probably happen to me someday?"...

IT PROBABLY WILL!