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Thursday, March 02, 2006

So, in normal behind-the-cinematic-times fashion, I finally saw Mystic River. I have to say I was highly dissapointed because 1) There were a lot of loose ends not tied up at the end, 2) I did not cry* although i fully expected to, and I mean I am a crier. I can't leave the house after watching "Legends of the Fall" because my face is so puffy. But regardless. 3) After discussing it with Andy we determined that the people who made the movie kind of assumed that whoever watched it read the book, so if you did not, you may have been like "Wait wtf?" like myself. Or maybe not. Maybe Sean Penn's enourmous boxy head was enough for you. That's fine too.

Anyway my main beef with this movie is not that it didn't make me cry, or that it is a poor man's "Sleepers" or that I still don't understand why Sean Penn didn't get arrested...

It's the Boston accents.

Now it's really time for some "wtf?".

Maybe it's because I had a Boston accent for so long (which I struggled to get rid of but it still comes out when I have been drinking or am super mad), but I don't understand why it is so hard to affect one. Seriously it seemed like a concerted effort for these actors NOT to say "r". And when it is done wrong, it is SO WRONG.


And don't get me wrong, I don't even like Boston accents especially (and forgive me if this is sexist) on women. But even I was feeling "Oh no you didn't!" about the accents in this film. Laura Linney did a disservice to any woman who speaks/has ever spoken with the Boston Accent. It was basically a cross between Frances McDormand in Fargo, and Kathy Bates in any Stephen King movie, with some kind of New York twang thrown in.

It was just WRONG.

I propose from now on, if you are not FROM Boston, do not star in a movie where you have to speak with a Boston accent.

Really, it makes me a little uncomfortable.






(*although I am willing to admit I might not have cried because Adam was staring at me, and when someone stares at me during a movie I cannot cry. The summer before 10th grade (i think?) I was away all summer, and when I came back , The Lion King had just come out and all my friends had seen it but we went again to see it anyway since I had not, and my friend Pat was all "omg, when Mufasa dies you will SOB!" so when it got to that movie i did start to tear up, but i looked out of the corner of my eye and saw Pat turned in his seat, full on facing me waiting for the waterworks, and suddenly I could not. I have been like that ever since.)

21 comments:

Sparky said...

I have the same problem with Southern accents. A true Southern accent allows you to determine where in the South a person is from, and it's easy and almost embarrassing to spot a fake. Actually, having lived in New York, I feel the same way when my very Southern boyfriend attempts a New York accent.

Mandy said...

What do you think about the Boston accents in the movie "Blow"? Not being from Boston, I don't know if they are accurate or not, but they sure are irritating. Especially the mother, how she calls him "Gawgie".

My hubby went to military training near Cape Cod last summer and came home and imitated the accents and all the funny things people said. He's good at that.

BTW, just b/c I'm feeling really chatty, today at work I'm wearing a fake blond ponytail, which I purchased last weekend at KMart. Now, it matches the color of my own hair almost perfectly, so if you didn't know my hair isn't quite this long, you might not even notice. My question is, is this trashy?

Sarah said...

its not trashy if you have the right attitude: like if you are thinking "i wear fake hair and i do what i want! i know i look GOOD" then that is awesome. but if you are like "i am hoping to fool everyone" it's not quite as awesome. either way i am a little jealous since the faux curly hair extensions look horrible otherwise i would be rocking those babies out from time to time.

Sarah said...

oh and i didnt see blow but part of it is supposed to take place 1 town over from where i live! so i will see it.

Ms. Momma said...

I don't get the end of Mystic River where Penn's wife is talking to him about being the king and taking care of his girls. What!?! What does killing off the wrong guy have to do with that?

clipper829 said...

First, I am loving the paisley.

Second, this is a huge pet peeve of mine, actors trying to affect a "Boston accent" in movies like Mystic River, Fever Pitch, etc. One of the best things about Good Will Hunting was how Affleck and Damon really used their accents to their best advantage, much like I do when I'm drunk, tired, or being obnoxious. I worked HARD to get rid of my Boston accent, but as we all know, it's never truly gone forever!

My husband tries to do a Boston accent and fails miserably. He usually tries to copy the Bernie and Phyl's commercials and I end up getting super annoyed.

Sarah said...

yes! i meant to mention GWH and how they do it RIGHT. because you have to be from here to do it.

oh and Adam does that ALL THE TIME "Buuhnie and Phil!". grr!

Nicky said...

I also HATE when actors try to do a Maine/NH accent in Stephen King movies. They always end up sounding like they have a speech impediment or they're Southern. My grandfather has a genuine NH accent. Like, in the "summah" time, he wears his "shats" and eats "cahn on the cahb". Here, wannabe NH-ites, try this:
http://www.calebw.com/SpeakMP3.html

Side note: Sarah, LOVE the new accessories & font on your page. Tres cute!

Lindsay said...

I love the design! Love, love, love it. I love when ben affleck lets his accent out. it's hot.

Chris said...

I happened to like Mystic River a lot (I read the book first, that probably helped), but I agree with you that Laura Linney's accent was completley fucked up. Also, they gave Lawrence Fishburne's character - a black man - a Boston accent. Um, excuse me, but black people don't really have Boston accents. Am I wrong?

Sarah said...

thanks girls!

and chris: you are not wrong.

anyone remember in Devil's Advocate when Keanu's (horrible) southern accent comes and goes throughout the whole movie? even though i like that movie, it was painful to hear.

Stephanie said...

You are right, literally NO ONE can do a good fake Boston accent. Drives me nuts!

Marisa Tomei in "In The Bedroom" is the closest to good I have ever seen. Even in "Good Will Hunting", Robin William's accent is bad, especially when says "Bah-ston." We don't say it like that! It's just not right.

Also, I was definitely disappointed by Mystic River. What was all the hype about?

Natalie said...

great new look--love it!

all the time people f*!k up southern accents--they make us all sound like stupid rednecks. very few people can pull it off--mary louise parker's character (ruth) in 'fried green tomatoes' has a great old-time georgia accent...but everyone else? yuck!!

MarisaJosephine said...

ok so i love the new banner head
and color combo for your blog.

i am so glad to see someone else love paisley just like I

bad boston accents and not wicked pissa

Marisa:)

kate.d. said...

He usually tries to copy the Bernie and Phyl's commercials

hahaha, oh how i miss those.

is it weird that i'm from massachusetts and can't do a boston accent to save my life? :)

clipper829 said...

Not to belabor the Bernie & Phyl's point, but the worst one by far is the most recent one where Bernie yells "Boys! Show them the LEATHER!" which comes out like "Show them the LEATH-AAAHHHH"

It sucks.

Sarah said...

LOL don't get me started on the bedroom sets:

Mirrah! Dressah! Five Nin-ey Nine!!

Okgirl Speaks said...

Sean Penn....*gag* Legends of the Fall *swoon*

The End

Jenny said...

PAHK THE CAH IN HAHVID YAHD.

The Pink Kitty said...

I don't have much to say about Boston Accents but I will say I love your template pattern right now! I've missed reading your blog! :)

p.s. tonight, I'm definitely going to be working your mantra! I've even passed it on to all my girlfriends!

Sarah said...

yyyaayy!!! you're back!!