Sunday, August 14, 2005

musings on a Law and Order rerun:

1) i hate it when witnesses say things in more words than they need to. like when Lenny asks the witness "what did he call the victim?" and the witness responds "does the word "bitch" mean anything to you?".
just say "bitch" or "he called her a bitch". only an asshole answers a question with a question. and only lenny gets to make the wisecracks

2) i like this episode because the mother is hooked on Medazzalin and i can totally relate to that. I haven't been hooked on it, but they gave it to me before I had my surgery (about 20 minutes before they knocked me out) and it was looooovely. i made me into such a surgery cliche - telling the surgeon and the nurses and anyone i was wheeled by that i loved them. it was awesome. if i had access to it i would definetly be a recreational user.

2a) Medazzalin dealers: contact me via email at

2b) just kidding

3) i also hate this episode because the daughter is such a whiney bitch. waaah! my father left my mother for a younger woman! waaah!!! i could never kill someone and get away with it because i can't keep a secret, even about myself. i would be like "i did it but i'm not really into the whole jail scene right now, ok? thanks". i would definitely not whine and cry on the stand. plus i would not wear a floral dress to the trial. a murder trial would definitely call for a suit. Chanel maybe? in navy. navy is a very "innocent" looking color. you wear black and you go to jail. trust me, i have seen enough of these episodes to know. black or red = jail. blue or green = mistrial!

4) when anyone is pregnant on this show, and they are described by friends/family as "very excited about it" then the pregnant woman usually end up murdered/kidnapped. word to the wise, do not be very excited about being pregnant. i would reccomend maybe "cooly apprehensive" or "somewhat ashamed". you know, to avoid drawing attention to yourself.

5) who is cooler than Jack McCoy? he's the only guy i will allow to use the phrase "pig in a poke" (repeatedly) and not hold it against him. sigh.

6) this is my second post about TV shows tonight. i fucking rule.


Kimmy said...

You are officially the coolest girl I know because you might just love Law & Order as much as I do!

Joe Sheezy said...

i read your site everyday. whatever you do, dont stop writing, because your daily musings are some of the best stuff on the 'Net. they are great relief from CNN's "the sky is falling but gas prices are rising" stories, plus your sarcasm is the classiest around.

Frankie said...

I got all confused when I read your Medazzlin comment. I thought you were hooked on rhinestone appliques...but then I remembered that's the bedazzler.

Sarah said...

thanks Joe :-) next time you're in btree i am buying you a drink!

amy said...

Maybe there should be a blog for L&O reruns? I could totally get behind that ...

Or maybe you could write daily haikus on the many reruns of L&O on TNT?

I'm just sayin' ...