Wednesday, April 23, 2003

warning: this entry is profane and obscenity-laced. the faint of heart should proceed with caution.

this was the most bullshit night at work ever! i am not being melodramatic: it is true. the only bright spot was a visit from miss jenny who kindly interrupted the maelstrom of bullshit i was bombarded with for four hours straight. so thank you to jenny, i always enjoy our clandestine conversations by the Coach display. :-)

anyway, about the bullshit - there are three parts to this lunacy that is retail. Or rather,retail with a stick up it's ass.

1) I have not been in work for a week, so when i peruse my sales=per-hour of the last week or so I am astounded that I have $500 in returns. This sucks on two different levels because a) i work straight commission exepct that b) when i make less than a certain amount per hour the store pays me $8 an hour which is pretty bad but you may think "well, it's better than nothing and you rarely have to do that anyway" but nooo because c) any money the store pays you, non commission, you have to pay back out of your paycheck. So this week, i OWE Lord and Taylor almost $40! Is this even legal? I am so tempted to write an expose about this for the Globe and just off the top of my head I have at least three co-contributers.

2) A note left for me from my manager reads "Sarah - you have too much stock to do. You haven't touched it in a week and so I am leaving you 18 pairs to plate, price and put out (this is a process, believe me)" Hello? I haven't touched it in a week because you havent scheduled me to work since last Wednesday, you douche. So I spent all night doing stock and not making any money for it until...

3) Tony the Area Manager calls me and requests my precense in the Executive Office (dum, da dum dum). I go, and am ushered into a little side office where the two Loss Prevention guys, Jim and Joe are seated with some paperwork in front of them. Tony then leaves and these guys begin to quiz me on "What Loss Prevention Means To Me" and so on, i answer their questions and they seem generally pleased with my knowledge of all things theft related. Then Joe begins with the personal questions: Where are you from, Where do you go to school: What do you do for fun. So I interrupt his tirade and say "Before I answer any more questions could I just ask why I'm here?" because as i mentioned I work commission and any time off the floor I do not get paid for. To make a long story shorter, I got in heaps of trouble for charging a $1.50 Godiva bar on my charge card while I was signed in. Because of this, I had to sit in this office for 45 minutes, while convinced I must be on "Punk'd" and trying not to laugh in these assholes faces, and sign an affadavit type thing addressed to "The Company" in which I was very circumspect and tongue-in-cheek about the whole ordeal (I am plagued with concern over my thoughtless misconduct will not be repeated) but luckily my tone remained seemingly unnoticed. I then have to meet with the General Manager this weekend to present my affadavit-type-thing and beg forgiveness lest further action is taken. I would wish that they fire me, but if you are fired/quit ater less than six months of employment then you have to pay back all the money you saved using your employee discount.

Such Bullshit!!!!!!

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