Enter one "Imitation Crab Product". Now, I know it sounds gross. But it is not, because of a few facts.
Word of wisdom. Well, two words. SUSHI MAT. You really do need one. They're like $4 at Crate and Barrel or probably like $1 at the Kam Man. And well worth the investment. You should also have a serrated knife on hand if at all possible.
Make a groove in the middle of the rice going across left to right and lay 1/4 of your fixings inside end to end.
Start to roll the mat over the sushi, using your fingers to keep the filings in place and your thumbs to roll. Once the side of the nori sheet closest to you closes over the fixings, continue to roll using the mat and when you reach the end of the mat press tight (but not too tight) so that everything holds together when you slice.
It sounds weird, but once you start doing it the mat really does all the work and you'll be like "oh YEAH". If you are me you will kind of scream this phrase.
Look at these beauties!
Now you will need to use a serrated knife to make the individual sushi rolls. You COULD use a regular steak knife but given that there are so many different textures you are cutting through, the serrated knife works so much better. Dip it in a bowl of warm water in between cuts to make it even easier.
Serve with soy sauce on the side for dipping and of course, if you can, eat with chopsticks!
I hope anyone who loves sushi but was nervous to make it at home feels more encouraged after reading this. You too can make sushi at home. It is easy. It's fun. And it's DELICIOUS. And maybe you can also get someone to take a picture of you doing your LOOK WHAT I HAVE CREATED dance afterwards.