Tuesday, April 08, 2008

The Meaning of a Motto

People give a f*ck about other people entirely too much.

And I don't mean people care about people too much, no I mean people give a f*ck about what other people are doing too much ESPECIALLY when those "other people" are single girls.

Allow me to elaborate.

If you are are a girl and not in a relationship then people wonder when will you get a boyfriend? Obviously you are dying for one so what's up? And if you are in a relationship it becomes OMG when do are you getting married? Obviously you are dying to get married right away so how come it hasn't happen yet? Then I suspect once you are married it's "OKAY! BABIES - WHERE ARE THEY?" and I really am beginning to suspect our only freedom will be menopause and even then who can really be sure. Freedom from tampons may not necessarily mean freedom from assholes.

And I should mention there are people who innocently ask questions because they are genuinely curious. I am not talking about those people. I am talking about people who are dicks about it. You know what I mean.

So these musings, coupled with some stories I have heard over the past few days, have made me realize something is LONG over due. There is something we all need that has been missing for a while and I think it's time to bring it back.

My personal motto.

My motto which is the namesake of this blog URL and which originated with my good friend Hill and I and that was borne of a deep affection for Eric Cartman, and for doing whatever the hell we want without explaining it to anyone.

"I look good and I do what I want".

Try it out ladies. Say it loud and say it proud.

The next time someone asks you the dreaded "So it's been a while since your last relationship, eh? What's up?" you tell them "I look good and I do what I want".

The next time someone opines "You guys have been together HOW long? And you aren't engaged? What's the deal?" you look them square in the eye and say "Well, the deal is I look good and I do what I want".

And for the married peeps when you hear "So where those babies at?" Feel free to say "Well Hmm not sure but I can tell you that I look good and do what I want".

And this motto is especially for people who consider themselves a cross between this

and this

Or basically for anyone who is tired of people asking you personal questions with an air of expectation and assholishness. You do things in your own way at your own time and if someone else has a problem with it well they are clearly not looking good OR doing what they want so they deserve our pity.

I look good and I do what I want. Learn it. Live it. Love it.


snedapants said...

yeah, i just got out of a five year relationship... after four solid years of 'so when is he going to propose?', i had a TWO WEEK break, and then people were asking me when i was going to start dating again. TWO WEEKS. i've been offered to be set up four times. it's been two months since we broke up.

i find this fucked up.

i shall embrace this new motto of yours post haste.

Sarah said...

I LOVE MONKEYS. your header is awesome.

second of all it's totally fucked up. it's like certain people have to put you into a little slot like "in a relationship" or "married" or what have you and when they can't put you in a slot they get confused. it's ridic.

E said...

OH MY GOD- this is PERFECT! i've been married four years (and don't want kids) but everyone i know, (and everyone i don't) always ask, "so when are you having babies?" now i'll know how to respond! THANK YOU! :)

J said...

Amen to that!

I've been with my boyfriend for six years and I think I have it bad (we don't live together) but my younger sister has been dating her boyfriend for ten years (since 8th grade!) and not only lives with her boyfriend, but owns a condo with him. One the one hand, it takes the pressure off me at family gatherings but on the other hand, it just totally sucks for her! I'm convinced they aren't going to get married for another ten years just to piss people off!

LA Blogger Gal said...

OMG! Where have you and your gloriously affirming mantra been all my life?!?!?! Especially since we've been married 'bout 4 years now (a month shy) and have no plans to have kids. This is just perfect. Thank you!

Ladybug's Picnic said...

Yeah and it doesn't stop when you have a kid, either. Because as soon as you have ONE it's all "Soooooooo when you gonna give her a sibling?"

I haven't even had this next kid yet and ALREADY I'm getting "soooooooooo you're not DONE are you?"

It never freaking ends. So I just look good and do what I want. Amen, sister.

lisagh said...

Love it! Indeed.

Libby said...

Amen, Sarah! And thank you for that, I really needed it. :)

ATC said...

I LOVE it! I can't wait to work it into my daily vocabulary!!! You're awesome- and, ya know what? I look good and I do what I want *snap*!

Anonymous said...

hallelujah. i will try and remember that. AND actually FEEL it, too. i really, really think i'd be much better off with more people like you in my life. as opposed to all my married/engaged AND withbaby friends... :) thank you!

Fabulously Broke said...

Hear hear..

Or you could alternatively say: "SHUT UP BITCHES!"

Kate said...

Love it!

Nicky said...

We haven't even hit our one year wedding anniversary yet, and I'm already getting the baby question. I'm seriously going to start punching people. What is the matter with everyone? All I can think is that misery loves company!
I was thinking that the next time I get a baby question, it would be funny to start sobbing and scream, "We're INFERTILE! Thanks for bringing up a VERY painful topic!!!" and running away. (It's not true, but at least they'd stop asking.) Saying, "I look good and I do what I want" might be more tactful though. Lol.

Becky said...

Love this post!

Thank you!

A Single MOTHER Who Looks Good and Does What She Wants!

Anonymous said...

Amen. We don't get the baby question too much (so far) because we both have loudly professed our not wanting children for many years now, but it sure doesn't hurt to be prepared.

Also, as much as they question you about when you're getting married when you've been together for years, getting married after only a few months freaks them out and makes them ask stupid questions too.

Norwego said...


For some reason my co-workers seen greatly troubled by the fact that my boyfriend and I are not engaged to be married. Seriously, this is a daily question from them. So instead of saying "Fuck off" I can now repeat your mantra.

Kerry said...


AmyD said...

A-f*cking-MEN!! LOVE this post, Sarah! This is now my new favorite thing you ever written:

"Freedom from tampons may not necessarily mean freedom from assholes."

Hee hee!

I look good and I do what I want, DAMMIT. :o)

K said...

I so needed your mantra today! I Look Good, I Do What I Want! :-)

Caitlin said...

Lord, woman.
Could you BE any more in my head?
I have been writing a blog on this for the past few weeks as WELL, because I am sooo sick of the "You're moving before you get a ring? Hold out for the ring. I did/I would/I enjoy making judgments on your life choices."
See also: "'re moving in together? You're not married though, right? [insert 'i'm confused' look here]"

I live in sin.
I look good.

RED said...

I get the 'when are you two getting married ALL THE TIME.' it settles down but as soon as a friend announces their engagement or I talk about a friends upcoming wedding, forget about it.
I look good. I do what I want.

Caity said...

Thanks for the reminder! It was much needed. :)

Norwego said...

Sarah, you have started a female revolution.

DiDi said...

Obviously, we're on the same page here! :-)

Me said...

I always know you are fabulous, but this was so gooooood to read again and funny. :)

Random Musings Of My Life said...


I look good and I do what I want!!

For 5 YEARS people keep asking where are the babies...

I do look good though... So does

Searching for THE ONE said...

oh you don't need to be married to get teh babies question. My grandmother has been asking me for great grandchildren since I was 16!!! (I'm almost 28 now). so yeah it's a bit tiresome! A couple of years ago at Christmas she bought me toys for my children!!! WTF?!?!?!? I donated them to a local childrens hospital! I mean seriously.

Jenn said...

WORD. For real, this post is awesome. You are so right.