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Thursday, January 10, 2008

A Handbag in Time

Today I left for a work a little late and as such as I was driving down the street there were little groups of kids making their way to the elementary school around the corner from my apartment.

And I noticed something.

Little girls carrying Coach bags. Not just one or two but like large groups of little girls traipsing down the street swinging their monogrammed Coach bags along with their backpacks.

??

My love affair with handbags did not begin until middle school and even then it was definitely not from COACH.

Unless Esprit is the Coach of the early 90s.

You know if you had a bag in middle school it was probably that canvas bright colored shoulder tote with ESPRIT logo in some other bright color on the side. Those bags were EVERYWHERE.

Which reminds me of a story:

My mom gave me this fabulous Esprit purse right before my first day of 6th grade as a sort of Good Luck in Middle School gift. It was the kind with the long skinny strap you wear over your shoulder. It was sort of tube shaped with a zipper on top and was black leather with a wide tan leather stripe running across it with the Esprit logo embossed on it. My first ever purse! How I loved it. I carried it every day!

Until one day the purse went missing and the next day another girl suddenly had the same bag that I had “lost” only she had scrawled her name across the tan stripe in permanent marker so when I accused her of taking it she pointed to her name to say “No, see? It’s mine! It has my name on it!”. I told the teacher (of course, snitch for life) that I thought this girl might have stolen my bag and this girl ran right up behind me and told the teacher that I was being RACIST and that’s the only reason I thought she stole my bag. Not because, you know, she never carried a purse before and then the day after mine goes missing suddenly she has the exact same one WITH the same scuff on the tan stripe that mine had. So the teacher told me she couldn't do anything, the girl smirked at me and I learned at the tender age of 11 that there is no justice in the world.

Well there is SOME justice because I got this girl as my Secret Santa later that year and for her gift I gave her some used Barbie clothes wrapped in tin foil and some old pencils I had stuck Christmas tree stickers on. Boo yeah.

Maybe I am still a little bitter about it. When I see a young girl with a handbag, I want to tell her "Write your name on the inside of it and never let it out of your sight!". Or 17 years from now you will still be bitching about it.

(Crap 17 years ago I was in 6th grade!)

19 comments:

tulipmom said...

Coach bags in elementary school??? That's just sick.

And good for you for getting back at that little tramp.

Lys said...

Not to totally put my 9to5 biznezz out there, but I'm about to. My boss' daughter is 13. She ABSOLUTELY couldn't go start her new year at school without CHANEL flats and a REAL LV handbag. She's 13. Hell I'm 36 and I can't even TOUCH the Chanel let alone buy it - but 13 year olds are more into the designer label - starter purses, I guess.

As for that little gal that stole your bag - shame shame. I'm sure Karma got her in the end.

The Wife said...

I can't believe the teacher said there was nothing she could do. How about contact the childs mother and ask if the bag was hers? I would still be annoyed too!

Anonymous said...

Sarah! That is an OUTRAGE!
That reminds me of the biotch in 7th grade who wore a hot pink Champion sweatshirt (OH how they were cool) day 1 of our awesome overnight field trip.
Later that night, she was seen asking for scissors.
Day 2? Her pink sweatshirt has been STOLEN and we are not allowed to do anything fun on our trip, just sit inside until the perp. gives up the goods.

Oh, and stare at said Biotch wearing a HOT PINK SWEATSHIRT EXACTLY LIKE THE ONE SHE WORE THE DAY BEFORE, minus the little Champion C.

Hmm, curious.

Don't worry, they're both living in trailers somewhere now.
Possibly even together.

Kimba said...

I even hate that girl!

I saw a gal with an Esprit bag at the gym yesterday. Memories!

Me said...

BRILLIANT secret santa gift...what a little bitch....LOL..great story...and yes, I have noticed kids with expensive purses too. Scary.

Anonymous said...

My fam was sort of in the lower middle class range when I was in elementary school. Even an Esprit bag was out of the question for me. I could only dream...
And Coach bags? Forget it! I'm still getting my purses off the sale rack and I'm nearing 30! If I ever have girls, they are going to be hitting Target up for their purses, you better believe it.

Anonymous said...

Yes, the small children with designer bags totally freak me out.

Almost as much as when I saw a 10-year-old at Target with an iPhone. Gah!

eileen said...

Hilarious!
My tube-shaped Esprit purse was also stolen in school, but I never learned the culprit's identity.

Another item swiped... my Adidas sambas.

Middle schoolers are such little theives.

Fried Hair Girl said...

what a little thief-ing shit head!

i was getting mad for you while reading this!

and dont worry i was a snitch in elementary school too. shoot sometimes you just have to be.

i hope that little fast hands twit got her karma when her love for all things couture came about. i hope her juicy, or d&g bag got run over bu a bus and shit on by a stray dog. :)

Suz said...

I had the exact same purse and would've flipped my shit if anyone stole it.

Anonymous said...

You would be amazed at how, as an elementary school teacher, I can tell thousands of spoiled too little for good freakin stuff stories I can tell. I...TOO many YOUNG girls have their own coach. I hate seeing them in the coach store shopping when I don't even go in there!! I also loved the...EEEWWW you only got a s___ ipod? not the whatever ipod? How cheap!! Or the You have only been to disnew TWICE?!? Miss D speaks right up and says...excuse me, but I have NO ipod, and I didn't go to Disney EVER until I was 16. Brats! MY FAVORITE lately though, is the 8 year old in my class who he AND his sister got iphones for xmas, but his stay at home mom told me she couldn't get two packs of index cards for him to bring into school. AAARRRGGGHHH!!!

Lesli said...

Oh, my gosh, that is the best purse story ever and I am with Lys--I bet karma got her. Or maybe it got her when you gave her the used Barbie clothes wrapped in aluminum foil. I like your idea of writing your name on the inside of your purse somewhere!

Cricky said...

what a croc...my daughter's lucky to get my "unauthentic" coach bags when I'm done with them.

Britt said...

As far as I'm concerned, Esprit was the COACH of middle school. How I wanted an entire Esprit wardrobe, couldn't afford it but my friend could..oooh middle school!

Tinfoil...hahahaha.

Jenny said...

My friend's 5 year old cousin will ONLY wear Juicy clothing. I don't own 1 piece of it because it's too expensive! She has Juicy days-of-the-week underwear that cost $50.

Sigh.

Sarah said...

It reminds me of, around Christmas time they had "Santa" taking calls from children on 105.7 and some of these kids were like "Hi, I'm Tina. I'm 8 years old. I want an iPhone and a Wii and a digital camera". 8 years old!!! It just boggles my mind. It's not that I don't think children deserve nice things, it's just seems wrong to me when a small child cares about high priced electronics and designers. My kids will be wearing burlap sacks and playing with sticks. That'll learn 'em.

k e r r y said...

I've seen little girls with Coach too and my step daughter got a big one (so she can also carry books) from someone for christmas - the size is one of the $500 plus range - silly. And by the way I would still be bitter about the Esprit bag too!

Anonymous said...

haven't you heard? entitled seven is totally the new thirty. but logo bags? how gauche!