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Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Not to be blunt but...

When did little girls get so slutty?

Seriously.

I was driving home yesterday and was abruptly halted on a side road near my apartment because the Tahoe in front of me had stopped for some reason. And by "some reason" I mean "because two girls in shorty short shorts and half shirts and HEELS were walking down the street". And the man doing the ogling? At least 20 years old. And these girls?

MAYBE 13 years old.

Um, when I was 13 I was wearing Champion sweatshirts and Z Cavarichi jeans and thinking I was the shizz. I would never in a million years have worn booty shorts and a half shirt, And even if I would have, my mother sure as hell would never have let me. And HEELS? Are you kidding? I didn't even think I saw a heel until 9th grade.

And you know I feel like I should not blame the young girl for dressing like a skank, I should blame the 20 year old man who should know better. But this is not a society where men know better, so it is up to us women to know better and to teach your daughters to know better. I am 26 years old and for all of my "I Look Good, I Do What I Want" talk, i know what it means to put on a really short skirt or a really low cut top. Certain male behavior goes along with those kinds of outfits and this doesn't mean I won't rock a mini or a halter top if I want but when I do so I am 1) knowledgable that I am making a statement to men and that statement is "Look at my breasts and/pr legs" so if they do so I should not be so surprised. and 2) I am old enough to deal with this kind of attention in a dismissive manner. It really doesn't mean anything to me.

But when little girls are 12 and 13 and getting that kind of attention, they are not mentally equipped to be dismissive. Their egos have not yet detached from other people's opinions of them. And those little girls on the side of the street seemed PSYCHED that this older man was paying them attention.

And that made me sad

And also ENRAGED.

I don't know who their mothers are or where they are or what kind of women these girls will grow up to be and maybe I am making a mountain out of a molehill but you can't tell me it's right for little, and i mean YOUNG girls to be dressing like that. And I see it all the time: Osh Kosh B'Gosh is being bulldozed in favor of tiny skirts and knee boots and for what? For fashion?

I weep for the time of Hypercolors and Girbauds.

And for the current state of affairs I can only look to one source however simple and perhaps not entirely responsible she is. I will say it anyway ( Sorry Chis and Jenny)

I blame Britney.

Seriously? Tiffany and Debbie Gibson made us all want to wear acid washed tapered jeans and questionable hats, not latex mini skirts and shirts that are really bras.

I don't know what the solution is. Maybe bring back overalls and Loony Toons sweatshirts as the Must Have outfit of the season for 12 year olds?

Maybe not.

23 comments:

Mandy said...

Amen. It's so disturbing to see little girls dresed like that. I can't believe how different it is from the way we used to dress--I mean, heels???? When I was thirteen the coolest shoes to wear (at least that I could afford) were those canvas Keds with the blue tab at the back of the heel. And that wasn't so long ago!

It makes me scared for those little girls, or to have a daughter!

Sarah said...

KEDS!!! I remember how I Had to Have those and when my mom bought me Candies instead by accident it was like the end of the world. haha.

clipper829 said...

Oh, man. I could go on for days on this topic, as a former assistant principal of a middle school. The slutty dressing, the parents who defend it - it's HORRIBLE.

My own daughter is going to be in Osh Kosh and Lilly until she's 45. I literally screamed when I saw INFANT clothing with writing across the ass.

e$ said...

checked out myspace lately? there's pics on there that make minis and half-shirts look MODEST.

i mean, REALLY modest.

Anonymous said...

i couldn't agree with you more. everything you said is true. as cliche as it is, the days of innocence is lost. it's a bummer. put on some shorts, a D.A.R.E tshirt and play kick the can. <3 danielle

Andy said...

There is something about Champion sweatshirts and brightly colored jeans that will always evoke a simpler time. These girls today will never know.

Anonymous said...

I completely concur, however...

For every 13 year old skank-in-training, there are an equal to greater amount of 13 year olds that are still the way we were at their age.

Take for example my sister and her friends. She's 14 (I'm 26). Her favourite top is a tshirt from Old Navy (which yours truly purchased) which is of the old school yellow and green volleyball variety. I have seen her friends sporting funky peasant skirts (I know they're last season, but they are 14...) with very cool accessories and fun tank tops. My mother won't let my sister wear anything that bares the tummy or has spaghetti straps.

All is not lost yet! :)

kate.d. said...

they say 14 is the new 17.

i know i'm getting old, because that freaks the shit out of me.

Jaime said...

it's funny that you should bring this up today! my husband had to go to the local high school for a work related thing and he called me disgusted by the way the girls were dressed - lots of those itty bitty "paris hilton skirts" as he calls them (short ruffle skirts). he literally called me just to say he can't believe how skanky high school girls have become.

and i don't blame britney so much as i blame parents for not explaing the difference beween "13" and "adult entertainer".

The Pink Kitty said...

I couldn't agree more. Although, it's been my experience where there's a hooched out 10+ year old (and yes, I've seen some hooched out 10 y/o's. It's so sad), there's a hooched out 40+ mom who thinks that she's still a teenager. It's not hard to imagine that when a mom dresses and acts as if she's a teenager rather than a parent, the kid will only put value in being a ho-bag too.

this is probably the main reason that I went from wanting two girls to two boys when I have wee ones of my own. I prefer Lego's to barbie any day

Lys said...

I just am shocked by what clothes these kids wear nowadays. Granted I was able to wear heels at 15, but 13? HELLO. I don't think so - and then they wonder why kids are getting pregnant at 10/11/12, etc.

That guy should have known better, but Sarah - I totally agree with you. These girls need to learn how to dress their age, not emulate Paris Hilton...

And technically - what talent DOES Ms. Paris have that is a positive role model for kids nowadays? Hmmm... that's a good question.

AmyD said...

I hate to sound all old and old-fashioned, but the solution is in the parenting. Any good, solid parent would smack some sense into the heads of their girl(s) for trying to pull that shit. It really disturbs me, too, and the only thing I think is, "I will vow to be a parent who doen't stand for THAT." Because there isn't anything else I CAN do. Along with the Britney's of the world, this generation with it's music, and TV, and movies, and MTV doesn't help to squelch the children's need to be the newest, biggest, most SHOCKING person of the week.

Shame, shame, shame...

Wow, I had no idea I had such an opinion about this, but now I'm just pissed. You should have gotten out of your car, pinched those girl's ears, and dragged them to the nearest Target GIRLS DEPT. ;o)

M said...

I agree... but I distinctly remember our jean cutoffs, black bodysuits and thigh highs too (although, we did have the decency to wear boots). Still, we were no angels at 13 - maybe thats why Jeannie's mom hated me for years.

kate.d. said...

that's the thing, though, AmyD - the target girls dept has turned into the juniors dept with smaller sizes!

Sarah said...

Megs, that was a one time incident! were we 13? when i think about the conversations we had later that night i am un peu horrified....

Mandy said...

That comment about the Target girls department is SOOO true.

I remember a brief time period when I was about 15 when combat boots were very stylish--worn with shorts and a baby T. I was guilty of sporting this look. WTF?

ka-rista said...

We must be the same age. I saved up two weeks worth of baby sitting money for my Z Cavs. Remind me to show you my fouteen year old sisters myspace, holy cow.

Vicki said...

Okay so I haven't commented before, but I had to delurk to say how much I agree and how glad I am that you brought this up - I thought it was just me!

I used to work with the buyers at a Bergdorf-type high-end store. The girl's buyer was maybe the worst - she would actually defend a $150 rhinestone G-string bikini in a girl's or toddler's size by saying "Girls want to look sexy!"

Of course it didn't help that the mothers buying their daughters such items (and more stripper skirts than we could stock) were desperately trying to rock the Juniors department and had no idea what washed-up old hags they really were. Those kinds of mothers raise those kinds of daughters and teach them to obsess over boys and flaunt their as-yet-undeveloped sexuality to get what they want. It's really unfair most of all to the kids, who are doomed to become their mothers.

Sarah said...

i'm so glad you all feel so strongly about it. it was weird. i didn't think i cared either way but when i really thought about it, i was so pissed!

Anonymous said...

just a random comment to possibly spin what is turning into a pretty one-sided debate. i think you were much to kind to chalk up male attention as some sort of "if you wear a halter top you should expect to be gawked at" natural reaction. it is one short leap to say "if you wear a halter top you are asking to be grabbed" or even "if you are wearing a mini-skirt you want me to sleep with you."

and of course they were psyched with the attention they were getting. it validates them as women. in a society that defines women as "to be looked at by men" and to be oggled by men, it is no wonder that girls grow up with all these mixed messages about what it means to be a sexual individual. and let's not kid each other, children are sexual. always have been and always will be. its the way that it is being expressed lately that is more telling about OUR times, OUR messages, and OUR values than anything that is wrong with these girls.

Sarah said...

i think there is a HUGE Leap from "if you wear a skanky top you should expect to be ogled" to "if you wear a skanky top you are asking to be assaulted". i can't even believe that was the direction you think I was going with that. i appreciate your input though, mr/ms anonymous.

Sarah M said...

I have to agree that most of the blame lies on the parents. My mother would have kicked my ass if I ever tried to walk out the house dressed like that at 13. As a matter of fact, she vetoed quite a few things. Granted, she may not approve of some things I wear now when I am going out, but like you said, I know what I'm getting into wearing a short miniskirt or halter top. I'm just old enough to know how to deal with it and not get into trouble.

Margaret said...

Were you at the Allied Gardens Springfest in San Diego? I saw those girls there-- running amok amongst families, young and old, gathered to watch Shriners parade by on mini-bikes-- there must be an epidemic. Egad-- I did more than my fair share of short skirts/high heels, but also in my 20s, and in clubs, and so forth. Now should we, as older wiser women, be running up to them with trenchcoats and shouting, "Put some clothes on!" and "stop looking!" at the men? (Somehow I came across your blog while Googling a way to cut a halter top out of an old T-shirt, enjoyed your post.)