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Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Adam and I are in the early stages of planning a trip to Paris next year. I vacationed there several years ago but did not TRULY appreciate it because 1) I had food poisoning for three days (and, in fact, vomited at Versailles) and 2) had just gotten through a nasty break up and let me tell you, being in romantic Paris after a bad break up is like rubbing salt in a wound. Anyway Adam has never been, and so we must go.

This is great for obvious reasons, but bad for one unavoidable reason.

I HATE to fly.

Now, I consider myself to be a good traveler, I enjoy going to new places, I like trying new foods and meeting new people, I pick up languages pretty quickly. But if you hop a transatlantic flight with me you better liquor me up or else be prepared to land on the other side of the ocean with bruises on your arm from me clutching it so tightly.

And I don't know how this happened. I mean I flew to Kenya when I was 15 and didn't bat an eye. But last year the 40 minute flight to Philadelphia nearly killed my nerves, I swear. And it has nothing to do with terrorism. I am not afraid of armed men taking over the plane (Well, obviously everyone is afraid of that but it is not what weighs most heavily on my mind). I just fear mechanical failure/plummeting into an ocean/mountain.

Or, you know, this


And it's not just fear...it's fear coupled with hate. I hate the cramped seating in coach, I hate airplane food, I hate being stuck in a small space with crying babies (crying babies are my lot in life as far as flying goes, there are always at least 3 on the plane with me who take turns lest I go 10 minutes without shrieking wails in my ear).

And I have to say, nearly everyone I know who is NOT afraid of flying has the same philosophy "If it's my time to go, it's my time to go". Um, no. When it is my time to go I better be asleep in bed and not 40,000 feet up in the air in a metal tube.

But in spite of this fear/hate...I still travel. I don't let it keep me on the ground (to the dismay of anyone seated next to me who has to hear my freaking out during turbulance/when the fasten seatbelt sign goes on)

But I hold onto the hope that someday in the future, they will put people to sleep for the duration of flights. Maybe a little laughing gas? Some general anesthesia? That's what I'm talking about.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, you still get airplane food? The last time I flew it was $4 for a snack pack of some fake cheese-product, goldfish crackers, and oreos - just what a nervous stomach needs!
-CTGirl

Sarah said...

well if you are in a 10 hour flight it is inevitable that you will want to eat SOMETHING. especially if you are chugging nips of vodka.

Anonymous said...

i hear ya.
im the same way... as soon as i get on the plane i start ordering drinks.

Anonymous said...

oh woops!

Kristen= anonymous

clipper829 said...

1. I have always been subjected to the screaming baby when I've flown. EVERY time. This August, I will be the one with the screaming baby. We'll see how that goes.

2. One word - halcion. I'm telling you, it is pure magic, just ask your doctor for it. You take one as you sit down on the plane, and you are OUT until landing time. And, the best part? No sleeping pill hangover. Truly, its the only way I fly. Well, when not pregnant. All the flying I did these past 9 months sucked.

Sarah said...

erin that sounds AMAZING. holy f. i wish i had known about it before!

kim said...

i guess i would probably no longer have a boyfriend if i had that problem. not that i'm a fan of it, nope. but you gotta do... you know, all that crap.

plus, after surviving my flight over there AND back with air india, i don't think anything plane- or flight-related can shock me any more...

also, paris is really close to bremen [well, kinda] - care for a stop in germany? i'd love to have you here :)

Natalie said...

take a 1mg ambien an hour before you get on the plane. you'll wake up in paris with no jet lag and no scary ocean to look at as you fly over. :)

Sarah said...

apparently all of my blog ladies are secret pill poppers. who knew? :-P

J-Mo said...

Paris seems like it would be a VERY expensive trip.

Have fun tho.

The Pink Kitty said...

I feel for you! I hate flying and screaming babies and hyperactive children are my lot in public places too. I've never heard of Halcion but I've used Benadryl before to get through flights. It knocks me out :)

Paris with your boy though should be a great experience! Lucky, I'm jealous!

Sarah said...

its not 100% definite yet, we are still working out details. but we will most likely be able to stay for free in a friend's apartment which makes it a much more reasonably priced trip. hopefully everything works out!

KO said...

HEY, who is that other Kristen?? When flying trans-Atlantic, one MUST always fly on a European airline. The food is always better, and they're much more generous with the booze (American Airlines charges for drinks on flights to London now!). This has been my experience flying to London for work, and I've had it confirmed adamantly by others who travel often for their jobs, too.