Baby You Can Drive My Car (If You Can Get In)

My car, she hates the cold.

Not that I blame her, I mean it has been COLD these past few days. Like 0 degrees windchill cold. If I don’t wear a hat outside within a minute my ears feel like they are falling off cold. But still, a person looks to their car to be able to provide some basic needs such as transportation and, well, being able to open the door and sit inside it.

Which unfortunately I was not able to do yesterday.

When I went to get in my car yesterday morning I found that it was impossible to open either door. I tugged, I kneed it and then tugged. I cursed and tugged. Nothing. It was like the doors had been sealed shut. Adam and I both struggled with it for a good ten minutes until he just offered to drive me to work that day which I appreciated, but all day I was like “WTF IS WRONG WITH MY CAR”.

Later that day Adam said “You know, maybe we should have tried to use the key”. I admit, this did not occur to me. Before you thing I am the biggest moron ever, let me tell you that I have keyless entry and the idea of using a key to open a car door and not a button is just foreign to me now. So foreign, apparently, that when my car door won’t open it doesn’t even occur to me to try it. So when we arrived home that evening I immediately went over to my car, key in hand, to try to open the door.

And my key did go in. Oh yes. And then became inextricably stuck. It took ten minutes of wiggling the key while standing in the frigid night air to release it from the keyhole’s icy grasp. And still NOTHING.

So this morning, knowing Adam could not drive me to work today, I left my apartment early to struggle with the car doors. To my surprise after a bit of wrangling and wriggling and kicking the door, it DID open. Hallelujah!

But then when I got inside and closed the door the overhead light that signifies that a door is still open, would not go off. And then when I tried to open the door again to slam it shut, it wouldn’t open. So once again my car is a frozen fortress only this time I am stuck on the inside.

Whatevs, I thought. If I have to go all Dukes of Hazzard when I get to work and crawl out the window I will. So figuring the overhead light was just some kind of cold weather glitch I pulled out of the parking lot and headed to work.

As I was driving down my street I could hear a whirring noise like wind was coming in somewhere but both doors were locked and all windows were up. I drove on, puzzled when suddenly, for seemingly no reason, my passenger side door flew open.

WTF.

I pulled over and examined the door. It WAS locked but somehow still open. How that happens I have no idea. So I unlocked, slammed it shut, and locked it again and took off on my way, one hand on my drivers side door in case it too decided that even thought it was locked it would fly open.

I made it to work safe and sound and, after a quick “PLEASE LET MY DOOR OPEN”, it did gracefully and easily like nothing had ever been wrong with it.

Lolita is a fabulous car but man, she is such a baby in the cold.